A major consequence of addiction can be the damage to relationships. Sometimes this damage is more evident and fallouts occur, but other times it can be less noticeable. Trust can be broken and friends and family may start pulling away or not sharing as much. They have trouble believing what the person says and having confidence that they will stay true to their word.
When struggling with addiction, people are more apt to lie, keep secrets, break promises, neglect responsibilities, and engage in other negative behaviors. This can be hurtful to those they love even if they realize it is unintentional. Trust is a fragile thing and relationships can become broken along the way. In recovery, clients can learn how to engage in more open communication, implement positive changes in their lives, and become more accountable. These are all steps toward rebuilding trust and relationships.
Be Patient
One of the most important things to remember when you are in recovery is to be patient. Just as addiction did not develop overnight, neither will trust. You may know that you have changed and are a better person now, but it can take others time to realize this as well. They may be hesitant to believe what you say for fear that you won’t follow through and they’ll be hurt again. Every day is another step forward and an opportunity to show that you are different.
It can be frustrating because you want things to go back to “normal” or the way they were more quickly than is possible. Keep in mind that it will take work. You have to put forth the effort to prove yourself just as the other person has to put forth effort to accept that you have changed and work things out.
Be Honest
Communication is key. Stop trying to make excuses and take responsibility for your actions, behaviors, and words. Breakdowns in communication can quickly lead to more troubles. If you are struggling or need help, let someone know. Don’t be afraid to reach out. You don’t have to go it alone. If someone asks you to do something and you don’t know that you can get it done, say so rather than agreeing to it and falling short. You know your limits and what you are capable of.
It can be challenging to share your true feelings and let yourself feel vulnerable. Doing so can allow you to better connect with those you love and show them that you are trying and do want to change. Letting them in and helping them to better understand what you are going through is one way to start repairing your relationship and rebuilding trust.
Take on Responsibility Slowly
Rather than diving right in and getting in over your head, take things slowly. Gradually take on more responsibility as you feel comfortable doing so. Start out with something simple and stick with it. Show others that you can be dependable and follow through. Keep to your word and do what you say you will, even if it seems like something small and insignificant. These small things will add up. As time goes on, family and friends will begin trusting you with greater responsibilities and tasks and test the waters. Continue to implement the strategies that you have learned in recovery so that you can be successful. Remember that your actions should match your words.
Have Confidence
If you want others to trust in you, have trust in yourself. Hold your head high and know that you are strong and able. You have worked hard to overcome addiction and turn your life around. Keep a positive attitude in recovery even if you are faced with challenges or setbacks. It may take some people more time to regain trust in you than others. Each situation is different so be realistic with your expectations. But believing in yourself can help others to believe in you as well.
Consider Therapy
While you may continue going to support groups and therapy for yourself, couples or family therapy can be beneficial as well. This can allow everyone to share their thoughts and feelings in a safe environment. The therapist can guide you through challenging situations and help to improve communication. You can work through what would be good strategies and changes to make to improve trust based on individual needs. It may also encourage others to keep an open mind and be more receptive to the effort that you are putting forth.
There is no blanket solution or single remedy to build trust. It is a process, much like recovery, and takes time. It can be quickly broken but takes much longer to repair. Have faith that you are doing the right thing and moving in a positive direction. Not every relationship can be saved, and some may change, but with hard work and commitment, you can rebuild trust.
If you are ready to overcome addiction and make positive changes in your life, Chapters Capistrano can help. Whether you are entering treatment for the first time or could benefit from a short time in detox to help you get back on track, our highly trained staff is here to support you along the way. Contact Chapters Capistrano today at 949-276-2886 to learn more about our luxury rehab program and how you can get started. If you want to start rebuilding trust in your relationships, the first step is to seek treatment for yourself.
